the new friendship.

When you are 24 years old, it’s hard to make friends.

Because once you know their weaknesses, you are no longer want to deal with them. You can’t take them for who they are.

Because you are too comfortable with your lifestyle, can’t adjust with theirs.

Because you think you are better than them, smarter than them, kinder than them.

Because you expect something in return. Someday I’m going to be needing his help, you think.

Because you subconsciously select your circle, a successful, smart, and elite circle.

Because once you label someone’s as toxic, you avoid that toxic to protect yourselves of being hurt.

Because you are too old to fake, meaningless friendship.

But also, probably just because you already have best friends since ages, they are the most lovable persons, they know you, the real you,  they don’t give a damn with your madness, they forgive you easily, they are imperfect but you get to used with it, they are the reason you laugh at our phone.

To someone like me, new friendship is just overrated. I like the old ones.

he is one level up.

 

Do you know that I love you?

I love you means I want the best for you.

Even when you like Uncle Scrooge and I like Minnie Mouse.

Even when you want to focus on something but I want to talk to you.

Even when you want the tasties and I want the healthies.

Even when you prefer mountains and I prefer beaches.

Even when you want to do something productive but I want more sleep.

Even when you feel hot and I feel cold.

Even when you want to watch Naruto and I want to watch something else.

Even when you and I get stressed out due to work.

Even when you and I pick the same case color of Chacha.

Even when you and I busy with our phone side by side.

Even when you and I fight.

Even when you and I don’t think we are at fault.

Even when our ‘best’ is two different definitions.

Even when it’s hard to love each other at times.

I just realized how strong our compromises are.

I am forever be grateful for having the best Boyfriend ever.

A wish to you this year :
I hope whatever you decide on everything in life, big or small, I hope they will lead you to a better path, better you.:)

Happy 26th Birthday, sayangku.
You are now one level up!

Selamat berbahagia dan sehat-sehat ya.
Tuhan berkati dan sertai selalu.

I love you.

-TS

 

 


 

I should have sent this right on 01:00 am (00:00 in his current time-zone), but I was overslept! My alarm wasn’t working. Guilty! So I form this when I woke up at 03:00, an hour later it’s done, sent it, wash my face and back to sleep.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

shine.

Once upon a time there was a meeting of minds

The sun and the moon made a deal with the sky

One would take the morning and the other the night

Together they would blanket the world with light

But the moon had a shadow, he felt like a liar

The sun was the only one who carried the fire

The sun saw this, she kept on glowing

Bound to the moon, never saying, “you owe me”

She said I’ll shine on you

I will shine on you

I keep a lamp over you, glowing in my heart

To keep from tripping over troublesome thoughts in the dark

We ain’t that different, we huddle underneath the same stars

I see who you really are

You’re every creature, every man, every woman and child

You’re the closest thing I’ll ever get to knowing God

Like the sun to the moon, I’ll send my love and light

A love like ours, it’ll fill the whole sky

I will shine on you

Think of the people that you love the most

Send them your light and hope it glows

Say I will shine on you, I will shine on you

No matter the distance, the space, or the time

Love travels in the speed of light

I will shine on you

I will shine on you

Jason Mraz – Shine

One of my favorite song, ever.

are we looking for love?

*Play Love Someone by Jason Mraz*

Love Is (1)

Love is a funny thing
whenever I give it, it comes back to me
and it’s wonderful to be giving with my whole heart
as my heart receives your love

Love Is (2)

Oh, ain’t it nice tonight we’ve got each other
and I am right beside you more than just a partner or a lover
I’m your friend

Love Is (3)

When you love someone
your heartbeat beats so loud
When you love someone
your feet can’t feel the ground

Love Is (4)

Shining stars all seem to congregate around your face
when you love someone
it comes back to you

Love Is (5)

And love is a funny thing
it’s making my blood flow with energy
and it’s like an awakened dream as what I’ve been wishing for, is happening
and it’s right on time

Love Is (6)

Oh ain’t it nice this life, we’ve got each other
and I am right beside you more than just a partner or a lover
I’m your friend

Love Is (8)

When you love someone
your heartbeat beats so loud
When you love someone
your feet can’t feel the ground

Love Is (9)

Shining stars all seem to congregate around your face
when you love someone

Love Is (10)

We’re gonna give ourselves to love tonight
lifting up to touch the starlight
and we will savor every second we suspend together
You and I will
Love Is (11)

When you love someone
your heartbeat beats so loud
When you love someone
your feet can’t feel the ground

Love Is (12)

Shining stars all seem to congregate around your face
when you love someone
it comes back to you

 

every time I miss you.

I walk in a lounge full of people,

all eyes on me.

Some of them chat, some of them worry, some of them just stay silent.

Still haven’t seen my mom, I blankly sit on a couch, never liked the smell of the room.

A friend of mom, Tante Esther, hugged me and said,

“You should say something to your father.”

She added, “tell him, before it’s too late.”


It was too late.

 


 

I’ve had never been able to speak a word.

I’ve had never been able to say I love him, to let him know I need him to stay alive.

I don’t know which part of me should be burnt, the rebellious Tasya still believe he would survived.

But he did not.

 

The regret haunted me for years.

The scene of ICU, his comma, the tears, I have not quite moved on yet.

It still hurts every time it comes to my memory,

every time I miss him.